Being pregnant is an awesome experience that we get to encounter. We get excited to find out gender and to have that perfect baby bump. There is so much to look forward to. People around you are constantly asking about the baby and excited for the arrival of this new bundle of joy. While there are certainly many positives to being pregnant, some of us struggle with it as well.
Now that I am in my third pregnancy, the struggle has become real. I’m not talking about nausea or headaches. I mean struggles within yourself, your family, and friends.
With our first, I was able to sleep and pretty much take care of myself. Ryan didn’t mind if I slept all day because it meant more video games for him. So he never complained and let me do what I needed to do in order to get through the pregnancy. Everything was new to us so even though it was exhausting, it was exciting.
With our second we had a much busier life, we had one toddler running around but I was still able to keep up with cleaning and laundry. This time around we have two little ones that we must run after. It is rough. I cannot sleep when I want to because Hailey refuses to nap. I am running back and forth on a daily basis to our local YMCA for swimming, gymnastics, ballet, and other activities. Our life is hectic and our house is too.
With all of this, I still have to try and give the best of me to Ryan and the kids. Unfortunately, I do not always succeed. Pregnancy does not always bring out the best in me. I tend to yell more and become inpatient. I don’t want to be touched and feel uncomfortable most of the time. I understand exactly what is happening to my body but those around me don’t. I have to fake a smile at times because it is just easier to do than having to explain what I am going through.
People just walk past me and see a cute pregnant lady. Or so I hope. My husband may not see physical changes until the halfway point in my pregnancy and my kids just see mom. My friends may wonder what has happened to me because I haven’t answered their texts or phone calls. I am just trying to cope with all the changes my body is going through.
Whether you are an expectant mother or daddy to be. I just want to say that a lot that comes with pregnancy is unexpected.
Some ladies have more energy during a certain time in their pregnancy, others are on bed rest for weeks. Some want to eat everything in sight, while others cannot stand the sight of food. And believe it or not, each pregnancy is different and unique in its own way.
The biggest struggle in our family was keeping up with housework. I think I had about two hours in my day when I had energy. I spent those couple of hours playing and teaching my kids. I did not cook because I gagged at the sight of food. Even though my husband is quite understanding most of the time, I don’t think he fully understood what I was going through. It’s not his fault. I actually think it’s just the lack of education that if offered about pregnancy.
All of us mommies know that there is so much that goes on with our bodies that is never talked about. The uncomfortable stuff. One of my biggest issues that I faced is low sex drive. Anything that had to do with my husband I wanted no part in. It was very hard on our marriage. For the first couple of months, I literally isolated myself. This was causing arguments and concerns in our relationship. It would also reflect on our kids. They saw how crabby mommy and daddy were and they began to act in the same manner. Then came the stage in my pregnancy where people did not know whether to say congratulations or worry about my weight. These insecurities made it worse for me because I didn’t feel my best. How could my husband find me attractive?
I never knew that my body and my mind would go through such a rollercoaster of emotions. Society paints such a wonderful picture of pregnancy and they don’t go beyond the belly. Because pregnancy is so common, those around us don’t see it as a struggle.
Being able to carry and birth my children is the biggest blessing I could have ever asked for but it hasn’t been easy. Fortunately, this will pass. It’s normal to feel insecure and go through hardships during your pregnancy and that’s why we need to give ourselves a break. Remember we are growing another human. It is not supposed to be easy.
If you’re going through any struggles during your pregnancy, just remember that it will get better. in a few short months. You’re allowed to feel different, sad, happy, and frustrated. Your family and friends just need to understand that you are not perfect and neither is your body. Instead, they need to encourage you because each day that passes you are closer to meeting this new baby. Love yourself and embrace all the good and bad that comes along with pregnancy because there is someone out there who would do anything to be in your shoes.