This year we will be in the Big Apple for Christmas. Most would rave about The Rockettes, Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree, or the Union Square Holiday Market during this time of the year. While all that sounds AMAZING, there is still something else that is above all that-my mother. Obviously, I am super excited to see the rest of my family but there is just something special about this lady that I get to call Mom.
You see when I was younger, I couldn’t wait to move out. I had so much fun learning and building a life of my own away from my parents, but something changed along the way that made things different for me. I had kids.
Let me start by saying that Ryan and I adore raising our children and learning with them, but we wouldn’t be able to do it without help from our families. I have the in-laws close by who help a ton and I am so thankful for them. But not having my family close and especially my mother has made things very hard for me.
I’ve always been one to think I can do it all by myself but let me tell you, kids will get you off your high horse.
My mother was in town a week after Jonathan was born. She helped with the kids, cleaned the house, did the laundry, rearranged some furniture, and helped me get my life together after having a baby.
As her departure was nearing, I thought to myself, “It hasn’t been so hard, I can totally do this by myself.”
Boy, was I wrong!
The day she left my house slowly started turning into a disaster. I couldn’t keep up with the laundry and I was losing my mind. I honestly think I just took advantage of having my mother here for that week. From the moment I had picked her up from the airport, I felt as if a weight was being lifted off my shoulders. Even though I am 25 years old, I know I still need her.
Every day that goes by that I don’t get to see her is also a day closer to being with her. Luckily, I am able to travel quite often but it’s not the same. It just makes me sad to think about the relationship that my children could have with her but don’t.
I was talking to Ryan the other day about the kind of grandma I want to be. I want to be there for birthdays, holidays, babysit for date night, and slumber parties. I know my mother craves the same with her grandchildren and it sucks!
For those that have your mother close by, love on her! Take her out to dinner, go shopping with her, or watch a movie together. Because there are others out there who don’t have mom close by. Mine is 968 miles away and I wish I could do those things with her but I can’t.
But here’s what I can do:
Enjoy every single moment that I do have with her. I’ve learned to let the little things go because I don’t have time to worry about arguments and differences between us. I have just enough time to remind her how special she truly is.